Wednesday 13 March 2013

SAHM confession - It can be lonely!

I have a confession to make... Being a stay at home mom can be very lonely.

This has been on my brain the last 48 hours and I debated blogging about it, because being a stay at home mom is a wonderful blessing and I don't want to give off the wrong impression. I know many are not lucky enough to be able to stay home so I don't want to seem ungrateful for the circumstance that I am lucky to be in. But it's the truth. And after reading several articles that have been circulating lately about what a mom should or shouldn't do I feel compelled to elaborate on my thoughts.

I am a social person. I always have been. I love to be around and chat with people about anything and everything. Before I had kids I worked full time in various jobs that still allowed me to be around people a majority of the time. On long draining days I dreamt of being able to stay at home when I had kids and how much 'easier' it would be to do so. But suddenly you become a mom and it's just you and kids 24/7 and a long list of things that need to be done around the house. Again, not such a horrible thing, but it's not always easy either.

Often during the day I find myself watching the clock for when my husband will get home. Yes, sometimes it's because I am desperate for a break and a little bit of 'me' time. But it's also just the fact that in a few hours I will have another adult to converse with. Or even simply to sit next to! Someone who doesn't require me to wipe their nose, change their bottom or entertain them. Plus, when it's my husband it's someone who loves me very much and who I dislike being away from.

I have things that I do to keep myself distracted or from getting too lonely. Play groups, phone calls, church activities and home schedules that I follow. All help combat that feeling of having no one to talk to but your toddler. Yes, even facebook helps to get in bit of 'social time.' And It's not like I am sitting around with nothing to do all day! Trust me, it's quite the opposite! That is where part of the battle comes in! I find myself thinking, "hmm, I should invite so and so over for tea." But then I either convince myself they'd be too busy for me anyways or else I think about the state my house is in and drop the idea. But there are still some weeks or days where it gets hard. And I know I am not the only one who feels this way.

Every moment of our day is dedicated to our families. It's our calling and we are happy to do it. Most of the time I love it! But I just had to throw it out there in case others aren't aware or in case mothers with grown up children have forgotten (because I am sure they felt this way then too!)

It can be lonely.



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